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PHOTO GALLERY - Turnmills Review Valentines day Technics Launch Party feat DeepDish

After much thought I decided to drive to Turnmills nightclub for the Valentines Day/ Technics DZ1200 CD Deck Launch Party, featuring an exclusive 6 Hour set by DeepDish. Considering I left at 12am from North London, it was a breeze; half hour and I was parked up and standing outside the club. For those who fancy a sober night of clubbing (no-one then), there is a car park a few feet away with ample parking.

The queue was instantly recognisable, a welcome observation set apart from the hordes of nutters that generally bundle into the doorway at most clubs. The security team present seemed professional and courteous enough, keeping close tabs on the queue, albeit stretching round the corner.
Turnmills is definitely a hi-demand venue, so arrive early or make sure you bring enough homework
to keep you occupied.

We were swiftly moved in to the club and had the privilege of being admitted into the VIP lounge, which although fairly small, was home to some of the most elegant décor I've seen. Golden Cupids littered the ceiling, whilst red ribbon and fabrics played among them. Some medium lighting- just enough to illuminate the face of your neighbour and various candle/ floral pieces were scattered throughout the room giving you the feeling that yes… you were indeed some place special. In one corner stood a magnificent willow and floral arrangement, decorated with small lights that somehow made the people seated around it seem more attractive. The smooth grooves being pumped across the airwaves extenuated the mood further and
I immediately felt relaxed.

A few Redbulls at the bar and one embarrassing chair-tumble later, we decided it was time to investigate what the external thumping on the walls was all about and move on from the starter, to the main dish,
or should I say DeepDish. My first reaction was how varied the club is in terms of layout and rooms.
One moment you are walking through a well-lit area where you'd be forgiven
for thinking you were outdoors; unpainted brick with ivy draped along the walls- and the next,
you're in the middle of a dark but powerfully atmospheric arena, with a dash of lazers here and there, complete with Hungarian exchange students trying to ponse ciggies.
The sound systemwas adequate enough for people to walk around in the usual 'dazed and
confused' state opted by most clubbers.

DeepDish aka "Ali 'DubFire' Shirazinia" & "Sharam Yayebi" were in the house and from the faces of the punters that walked straight into me.. were doing a real good job. Their marathon set was well underway when we reached the roadblock entrance to the main arena. Expert licks of deep bass accompanied by tribal beats were being served up to the hungry crowd. Some skilful euphoric sounds slowed things down a bit but shortly began causing a stir among the masses. Eventually a huge uproar and melodic handclapping enclosed the arena as the tempo slowly increased, the lazers began breathing new life and then….
BOOM, the drop everyone was waiting for, greeted with a loud cheer by those who could no longer
contain their love for the place they justdiscovered themselves in.

Claustrophobia, sweat and bruised feet were abundant, but the management could be forgiven
for their leniency on the door as it was Valentines Day and more importantly an incredible set was being blasted across their club by one of the most influential DJ duos of the Progressive House scene in recent times. But they cannot however, be forgiven for closing off half the club at around 4am and making matters worse with a capacity issue that to be frank, already had Hillsborough written all over it.
I did (after much investigation) manage to find a small corner where we setup camp for a while and
got into the groove of things. The DZ1200's had done DeepDish fair justice, having an almost seamless
night (excluding a few hic-cups) of tune spinning with the type of clarity only found in crystal.

Turnmills -as far as I could make out- is split up into five sections. The main arena- receives the triple D (Deep Dark and Dirty) rating of distinction with banging beats loaded in Dubfire's gun, a cosy but lively L-shaped bar section with people getting their groove on to Sharam Yayebi's funky, upbeat set or sitting in the comfy alcoves, a square-shaped room spinning a few choice house
cuts from the oldskool and a welcome getaway from the masses making the pilgrimage to the main arena,
a large chillout area with big cinema screen and loads of seating- v.cool, and finally
an upstairs area which was a lot brighter than most parts of the club but had its own bar.
All in all, the building oozes character and the décor was second to none. It's been a while
since I went clubbing and actually felt obliged to look for an ashtray for fear of making a mess.

To summarise- a stylish club with loads of eye-candy to keep you occupied and an intricate layout that will suit the adventurous clubber down to a T. Let down however by the clubs experiment to treat its punters like cattle by cramming as many as possible into a box. The crowd was varied, an interesting mix of fellow travellers from across the globe, loads of arse and your bog-standard Ben-Sherman badboy.
A fair ratio of boys to girls merits the club some extra brownie points. Try to have a translator at hand,
as almost all staff inside seemed to be studying the English Linguaphone course and won't be able
to help you unless you speak their native tongue.

That's not to say however they don't understand the language of booze as queue times for
the bar were not particularly long due to staff efficiency. Bouncers on the otherhand only knew three things- how to remove trouble, people standing on the stairs and your hopes of making a little more space inside. But in all fairness to the club, this was a huge night- DeepDish & Valentines rolled into one.
The jist I got from the regulars there, was that capacity was not nearly as high during their previous
visits and the venue on the whole was a place frequented by them again and again.
Above all I had a fun evening, I only wish I arrived in one of those human-sized balls used by
Gladiators on TV, to give me a little more room.

Final Frase: A Deep Squeeze that never looked so good!

Review by Mario K© for House Music Inyourface.com